Embracing change and growing older

One of my favourite Hindu goddesses is Akilhandeshwari, the goddess of ‘never not broken’ (or in other words, always broken). I’m sure I’ve written about her before; she rides a crocodile, harnessing the fears and challenges of life and using them to propel her forward. She’s a reminder that life is constantly in flux, and that it’s in the moments when things fall apart that we have an opportunity to grow, encouraging us to embrace those moments.

I turn 40 in a few days and I feel like the page has most definitely turned on one chapter of my life over the last year (#divorce!) This new decade is about something quite different to the last one, although I’m not completely sure what that is yet. But again I come back to Akilhandeswari; the flux of life, of breaking and rebuilding, harnessing our fear and riding it. And I come back to the idea of growth as we move from where we’ve come from to where we’re going. It might be a new chapter, but it’s the same book!

Whether it’s a change of circumstances, location, job, there are so many things that shift as we move through life; nothing ever stays the same. We can chose to live in the past, trying to hold on to the old chapters (which I’ve definitely been guilty of at times!) or we can turn the page and start to write the new one. When things feel like they’re falling apart, we can resist it or we can ride it. Either way, I’m not sure we can stop things changing.

Yoga gives us a lot to draw from during these times. From observing some incredible teachers who are quite a bit older than me, I know that yoga helps us to move through life with more physical ease and strength, which no doubt serves us in later years. It gives us mental flexibility which hopefully helps us to navigate changes more calmly. But there is also a lot to learn from the deities, rituals and the lessons they have to offer. Sometimes simple stories like that of Akhilandeshwari remind me that what I’m experiencing is normal, in fact so normal it was written about hundreds and hundreds of years ago and still relevant today! Whether you’re facing a new chapter yourself or reflecting back on how you’ve managed the turning of pages in your own life, perhaps there’s something you can also gain from this.

I’m also reminded of these two poems by Rupi Kaur, which sum up how I feel about another decade…!